Crescendo

Crescendo

Video performance, 2017

I wanted to incorporate aspect of time and its relationship to our physical and mental body. Specially, I wish to portray how people is affected by depression. I’ve heard depression be explained as your emotional self constantly holding a cup of water; it doesn’t seem too much of a burden at first glance, but holding even a cup of water for days, weeks, and even years is going to strain your body and feel as if the cup of water became heavier and heavier. Depression works similarly, like a constantly small weight that at first might cause a mild discomfort in your arms or hands, but over time causes cramps in other parts of your body until it is no longer small and insignificant but becomes a chronic pain that takes over your whole self.

I was inspired by endurance artists like Marina Abramovic and Emma Sulkowicz who believed that knowledge could be gained from pushing the body through a performance art. People can easily see and empathize with others who are going through physical pain, but mental pain is often really different to see.

I wanted to portray a version of the metaphor of the cup, in which I both test the effect of strain on my body as well as experience physically what people with depression might go through mentally.